You guys really don’t like Sharpies–the #badarchivists Twitter meme

I know today is supposed to include the unveiling of the Romance Novel Contest winners, but I think that will have to be pushed to the weekend by the crush of current events. It all started so innocently, yesterday afternoon, as so many things do, on Twitter. I said something about bad archivists, @sesuncedu replied, and then the lightbulb came on over my head: “oh no . i can see it beginning . this is the start of # badarchivists isn’ t it ?” And so it was! In the past fifteen hours, the Twitterati have devoted their creative talents to defining what #badarchivists are. After the jump, a hopefully complete compilation (as of this morning), but to whet your appetite:

I think there will be a follow-up post for this, with a few observations about the meme and Twitter, but this one is all about the fun. Note that this list is in reverse chronological order, so to see the conversation unfurl, start at the bottom. If the meme continues today I’ll either update this post or run another one if need be. Enjoy, and thanks to all who contributed!

EvolvingCritic
#badarchivists think accession refers to the ascension of Christ.

@perkinsy
#badarchivists give clients gloves the size of gloves worn by astronauts and expect items not to be damaged

@Retroinfo
#badarchivists don’t wear gloves when handling photos or negatives.

@perkinsy
#badarchivists make others laugh!

@helrond
#badarchivists print emails.

@DerangeDescribe
#badarchivists don’t bring anything to a virtual picnic.

@DerangeDescribe
#badarchivists email Jon Stewart to correct his pronunciation.

@DerangeDescribe
#badarchivists recursively forward their email and create an endless loop of #thatdarnlist OOO replies.

@DerangeDescribe
Okay, I’m not posting half my #badarchivists jokes because I’m saving them for future comics. πŸ™‚

@DerangeDescribe
#badarchivists post to #thatdarnlist and expect a short response from @NixoNARA πŸ™‚

@joojoolianna
#badarchivists can only lift 39lb boxes.

@DerangeDescribe
#badarchivists provide access to born-digital records by emulating Microsoft Bob: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZegWedG-jk4

@watzanem
#badarchivists just agree when people ask if they are librarians or if they work in libraries.

@DerangeDescribe
@watzanem really #badarchivists eat YOUR lunch in the processing room.

@allysoneb
@supriyavpw Ack! I once had 1920s print ads that were “repaired” with post-it’s. #badarchivists

@watzanem
#badarchivists eat their lunch in the processing room.

@DerangeDescribe
#badarchivists keep their film in cold storage…next to the condiments.

@watzanem
#badarchivists disrespect les fonds.

@DerangeDescribe
@archiValerie #badarchivists handle their backlog by hiding it behind an even bigger backlog.

@archiValerie
#badarchivists handle backlog by shoving a plunger into the toilet and flushing again #eww #imsosorryievensaidthis

@Salticidae
So those Lisa Frank stickers to ID series were a bad call? RT @DerangeDescribe: #badarchivists store collections in Trapperkeepers.

@johnwchapman
#badarchivists respect the Fonz

@DerangeDescribe
#doubleplusungood archivists report the condition of collections in Newspeak. #badarchivists

@DerangeDescribe
#badarchivists suggest Google searches in response to requests on #thatdarnlist.

@DerangeDescribe
#badarchivists let sexy princes distract them from SRS ARCHIVEZ BSNS

joojoolianna
#badarchivists yell REDROT! REDROT! when their coworkers walk around with red stains on their clothes.

@supriyavpw
#badarchivists store nitrate film in a room with no climate controls next to something very flammable

@DerangeDescribe
#badarchivists participate in LOCKSS: Lots of Cats Keeps Stuff Safe.

#badarchivists cross picket lines.

@DerangeDescribe
#badarchivists use nitrate film for access copies.

@DerangeDescribe
#badarchivists store collections in Trapperkeepers.

@kitschqueen
#badarchivists take their work home with them

@joojoolianna
#badarchivists think Provenance is the capital of Rhode Island.

@kitschqueen
#badarchivists organize records in order from most important to least important

@joojoolianna
#badarchivists Try to arrange newspaper clippings in ways that will leave the most visually appealing yellow stains on other papers.

@kitschqueen
#badarchivists tell patrons “feel free to take the duplicate copy home with you, we have more”

@Salticidae
In cursive. MT @joojoolianna: #badarchivists Think the only Archivists’ Toolkit they need incl. Plastiklips, #2 pencils & acid free folders.

@joojoolianna
#badarchivists turn up the thermostat.

@joojoolianna
#badarchivists know that the best way to store oversize papers is to fold or roll them up.

@joojoolianna
#badarchivists Think the only Archivists’ Toolkit they need includes Plastiklips, #2 pencils & acid free folders.

@joojoolianna
#badarchivists tell researchers that their grandmother was probably lying when she said she graduated from your University.

@joojoolianna
#badarchivists abbrvt. evryth. on thr. fldrs. #nd

@ARCHIVESHULK
#BADARCHIVISTS ARE EASILY PARODIED BY WEIRD AL IN FAT SUIT.

@woowooteacup
Bad archivists pronounce the word ‘accession’ ‘ascension’ – as though items are going to rise into heaven. #badarchivists

@NewMSI
#badarchivists “preserve” volatile nitrate film by replacing them with VHS tapes of break dancing monkeys

@pipingloud
#badarchivists sort photographs into two piles: mustaches and non-mustaches.

@NewMSI
#badarchivists change collection titles to be funny. For example: “Poops McGee Papers, 1923-1988”

@archivesinfo
#badarchivists let researchers “borrow” collections

@archivesinfo
#badarchivists use the Dewey Decimal system to organize collections

@helrond
#badarchivists shush.

@joanofgos
#badarchivists use pink, scented sharpies to identify people on the front and backs of photographs.

@pipingloud
#badarchivists laminate the most important documents.

@CyclinArchivist
#badarchivists don’t like kittens.

@recoverinhippie
#badarchivists still haven’t voted in the SAA election…(for @terryx666). The fonds respect des #badassarchivists

@pipingloud
#badarchivists know that in a pinch, a microspatula can double as a toothpick and a bone folder as a back scratcher.

@kitschqueen
#badarchivists throw out anything that can’t be identified

kitschqueen
#badarchivists keep only those letters written on the most aesthetically pleasing letterheads

@kitschqueen
#badarchivists let patrons rearrange all the folders in each box

@dadalibrarian
#badarchivists create backlog instead of working on the backlog

@EinAtlanta
#badarchivists think a microspatula is for tiny, tiny pancakes.

@EinAtlanta
#badarchivists practice more process, less product

@CMcCorkell
#badarchivists make sure the temp is always comfortable for staff during the day and let it drastically change at night to save energy.

@archiValerie
#badarchivists photoshop AT-ATs and TIE Fighters in the background of important battles & return the printed images to historic collections.

@archiValerie
#badarchivists serve pancake breakfasts in the reading room and use cold storage to store kegs of beer

@CMcCorkell
#badarchivists write on the front of photographs with Sharpie markers.

@laurabotts
#badarchivists abbreviate whenever possible and identify years with only two digits.

@allysoneb
#badarchivists use the word “miscellaneous.” #petpeeves

@laurabotts
#badarchivists practice mass acidification.

@pipingloud
#badarchivists don’t take lunch break – they eat at the desk, using documents as napkins.

@Arkascha
#badarchivists process first and think later.

@laurabotts
#badarchivists label photos with Sharpie markers. Wouldn’t want them to be hard to read!

@CyclinArchivist
#badarchivists put everything in miscellaneous folders

@archiValerie
Happy birthday Robert Bunsen. #badarchivists will install your burners in the reading room and leave them on overnight.

@laurabotts
#badarchivists Open all the blinds and turn on all the lights so they (and their patrons) can read those old, faded papers.

@herodotusjr
#badarchivists don’t understand why we have to even CARE about Henry Winkler. http://bit.ly/f5w7pU

@laurabotts
@archiValerie I think I’ll ‘shop in some lightsabers next time I work with a photo collection… #badarchivists

@baeeunkyoung
#badarchivists turn up the heat sufficiently when they are working at a storage room to take care themselves not to catch a cold.

@spcouta
What an entertaining #! #badarchivists plays trash can basketball with 19th century documents.

@archiValerie
@laurabotts It’s only wrong if the images are not explicitly labeled as having been altered and not in their original state. #badarchivists

@baeeunkyoung
#badarchivists throw away all the documents that are tattered and moth-eaten to clean up a repository and keep shiny shiny collections.

@pipingloud
#badarchivistsΒ Sharpie mustaches on every photo!

@archiValerie
#badarchivists add more process and create less product #MPLP

@archiValerie
#badarchivists don’t even respect your mom, let alone respect des fonds.

@mfbjr
#badarchivists clean glass plate negatives with Windex

@archiValerie
#badarchivists do not respect original order and just place collections in order of “who would most likely win in an MMA tournament?”

@hn0d
#badarchivists process collections with a Cuisinart.

@MuseoBlogger
#badarchivists take the gloves off when the rest of the staff heads home for the night. #badcurators do too… πŸ˜‰

@archivesnextΒ @l1br4r14n @cmz1018 I will summarize this as #badarchivists don’t use authority control

@arkivist
#badarchivists don’t know what a SIP is in 2011

@ArchAHeritage
#Badarchivists allow film crews to use ‘atmospheric’ candles to read documents by (true story!)

@vurayav
#badarchivists Excyoose me! Eye ment ‘ackcess’

@ArchAHeritage
#Badarchivists use pesky rubber bands instead of tying tape

@vurayav
#badarchivists rite teh fining ade in LOLspeak! I can haz access?

@hn0d
#badarchivists make manuscript origami.

@ekpheartsbooks
#badarchivists write on photos with permanent marker…

@hn0d
#badarchivists make manuscript origami.

@weymu
Bad archivists leave newspapers in the sun. #badarchivists

@hn0d
#badarchivists decrease access.

@MuseoBlogger
#badarchivists let toddlers play with crayons on bring your daughter to work day!

@sesuncedu
#badarchivists know that preservation sometimes has to take a back seat to annoying patrons

@d_boisvert
and write on the files with permanent marker. #badarchivists

@DavidRowntree
Bad archivists preserve master files using compressed and highly proprietary formats. #badarchivists

@elizabethskene
Don’t forget original disorder! #badarchivists

@vurayav
Every Friday at the archives is 52-Pickup Day! #badarchivists

@jessinanutshell
#badarchivists disrespect des fonds.

@cmstaylor
#badarchivists ignore copyright and copy anything they want

@roninarchivist
RT @archivesnext: Bad archivists add staples and paper clips. #badarchivists [WORSE! They use straight pins!]

@RandomArchivist
#badarchivists write in pen instead of pencil

@cmstaylor
#badarchivists write in pen and lean on documents

@weymu
#badarchivists use Scotch tape. -m

@roninarchivist
#badarchivists also arrange collections based on alphabetical arrangement of middle names

@herodotusjr
#badarchivists don’t have a plan to deal with electronic records. #onetrackmind

@dadalibrarian
and sticky notes or post-it flags – what are they thinking? #badarchivists

@exhibitsmith
Bad archivists fix their photos with tape. #badarchivists

@archivesnext
Bad archivists add staples and paper clips. #badarchivists

@sesuncedu
Bad archivists write hiding aids. #badarchivists #archives

@archivesnext
.@sesuncedu Sez bad archivists add extra acid to paper. What else do #badarchivists do, I wonder?

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2 thoughts on “You guys really don’t like Sharpies–the #badarchivists Twitter meme”

  1. Pretty much eliminates the need for archives education programs – just read these, do the opposite, and you too can be a professional archivist. πŸ™‚

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